There’s a group of words that are ruining sales copy for businesses everywhere.
They slither into your writing and you don’t even notice you’re using them.
These words are adjectives.
Cast your mind back to your school days and you’ll remember adjectives are describing words like pretty, stylish, gigantic, or murky.
And if your English teachers were anything like mine, they’ll have encouraged you to dollop adjectives into your writing to make it more descriptive.
Now, it’s fine to use a sprinkling of adjectives in your copy. But like too much sugar on your cornflakes, too many adjectives add a sickly-sweet edge, taking your writing from forceful to forgettable in seconds.
In sales copy, flowery adjectives like fantastic, cutting-edge, and stunning pop up all the time. And when you use them, your copy risks sounding just like everyone else’s.
I mean, how many times have you read the words, we offer an outstanding service, or our amazing new widget combines state-of-the-art technology with sleek design..?
The alternative to adjective overload
Naturally, you still want to create copy that inspires an emotional reaction for your customer. The trick is to give detail without resorting to meaningless adjectives.
How do you do this? By swapping adjectives for facts.
Facts tell your customer everything they want to know, without room for doubt or misinterpretation.
For example, if I’m buying a new bag I don’t want to read that it’s large – that doesn’t tell me anything. I do want to know that it’s large enough to fit an A4 notebook.
You can’t argue with facts. And the more facts you give, the more confident your customer will feel about buying from you.
Add factual detail
When you use adjectives like stunning or vibrant, it’s hard for your customer to imagine exactly what you mean. But add factual details and they’ll understand in a flash.
Instead of writing: Enjoy stunning views from your balcony…
Add factual detail to say: With views stretching from the Grand Canal to the Duomo, you’ll want to spend all morning on your balcony.
Or instead of writing: The area is famous for its vibrant nightlife…
Tell us what makes it vibrant, like this: You’ll find over 120 bars and restaurants within five minutes’ walk of your hotel, with most staying open ’til 3am.
When adding facts and details to your copy, be specific.
Say you sell supercars to millionaires. Instead of writing: This eye-catching car looks truly sensational…
We could say: With its super-lightweight soft top that opens in 16 seconds, this car grabs the attention of every passerby.
See, we’ve gotten away with using an adjective: super-lightweight because we’ve quickly followed it with a specific fact to add substance to the description.
Now it’s over to you. Grab your red pen, go through your copy and strike out any weak adjectives. Swap them for facts and details and you’ll improve your writing in minutes.
For more copywriting tips, hop over to the website where you can download my e-book: 19 Quick Ways to Improve Any Piece of Sales Writing
Thanks for reading. Now go write that copy and reel in those sales.